Robert Jenrick insisted things were tickety-boo for Tories outside London, while Oliver Dowden talked up Brexit opportunities

On days like these, every prime minister needs his useful idiots. The morning after the local elections is a time for twattery as all parties try to make sense of the results and give them the best possible spin, so any sensible MP makes sure to steer clear of the airwaves.

Unless, like the unknown – even to himself – Tory MP for Ruislip, David Simmonds, you’re using the opportunity to call for your leader to go over Partygate. Though once he’d sensed his was a lone voice and that others were biding their time for now, he rather rowed back. He just wanted Boris Johnson to rethink his priorities. Of course he did. So brave. We won’t be hearing from him again.

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