Raquel Leviss is sharing her take on “Scandoval.”
The reality star, 28, opened up about her affair with her “Vanderpump Rules” co-star Tom Sandoval and its aftermath that made headlines earlier this year.
“The concept of an affair hits home, hits really hard to a lot of people,” Leviss told Bethenny Frankel on her iHeart Radio’s “Just B with Bethenny Frankel” podcast on Wednesday. “So I think there was a lot of projection happening, a lot of emotions that came up for people. And unfortunately, I was the punching bag for a lot of that.”
Leviss also acknowledged “the hurt” she “brought to a lot of people.”
“I was not careful in my actions and I was not thinking long term,” she said. “I was completely wrapped up in heartbreak and wanting to get certain needs met. Looking back now, I can see that I was still healing from a relationship from somebody who I thought I was going to marry. And ending that, I still haven’t healed yet.”
In Season 10 of “Vanderpump Rules,” longtime partners Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix revealed they were breaking up. Not long after, rumors surfaced that Sandoval had cheated on Madix with Leviss.
The fallout from the cheating scandal was dramatic, with the aftermath playing out in an explosive three-part reunion.
In April, Leviss checked into a facility for mental health treatment.
She opened up to Frankel about how her time in therapy changed her outlook — including her decision to begin referring to herself by her birth name, Rachel, instead of Raquel.
“So I changed my name to Raquel in first grade,” she explained. “There were a few other Rachels in my class and I wanted to be special. I also feel like deep down, I wasn’t comfortable in my own skin. I wanted to be somebody better in my eyes. And so Raquel was a way for me to kind of be that person.”
She shared that in therapy, she was asked to write her name on a whiteboard, and she wrote Rachel.
“(My therapist) was like, ‘Interesting. I see you as Rachel to your core. You’re going by Raquel, which is OK, but it’s not true to who you are. It’s a wall you have up,’” Leviss recalled.
“I feel like most of my life, I’ve been afraid, I’ve struggled with social anxiety, I’ve struggled with judgment for other people. So having a fear of vulnerability makes sense,” she continued. “So I’m really just trying to come back to my roots, and I’m introducing myself as Rachel.”
Frankel also asked Leviss how she felt about Madix being painted as “America’s sweetheart” and receiving endorsement deals and making talk show appearances in the wake of the cheating scandal.
““Part of me says, good for you, because take advantage of these opportunities while they come your way,” Leviss said. “But it is hurtful to me just to think that — my nature is very kind and forgiving and understanding of other people, so the concept of me being the ultimate reality TV villain just blows my mind. And the way that she spoke to me at the reunion, I feel like it was uncalled for.”
Source: | This article originally belongs to Nbcnews.com
