The greatest test of the Queen’s 70th year on the throne will be the moment when she is forced to consume the successor to coronation chicken
The elderly don’t tend to eat as much as younger people. That’s just something I’ve noticed – it’s not from a proper survey commissioned by Saga Holidays or a stairlift manufacturer so you can’t rely on it. But it seems to me that, in general, they eat sparingly and with care, their days of inhaling gallons of carbs and cream and booze now behind them. The older they are, the more this is the case, and so the plump pinkness of late middle age morphs into a watchful and wiry grey.
Which leads me to ask: is a great big brand new pudding really what Her Majesty the Queen wants as she celebrates 70 years on the throne? She’ll be 96. Is that what she’ll be in the mood for while she marshals her resources for an intense period of engagements? A great big creamy platter. That’s the plan: a national contest to come up with a platinum jubilee pudding to counterbalance the invention of coronation chicken with which the reign began and that, for many, is still repeating. The mere thought of it is making me feel bloated and I’m greedy, overweight and half her age.
