The comedian, 54, on the importance of activism, her starstruck meeting with Lauren Bacall and the perils of teenage drug abuse

I learned you cause your own neurosis early on. At one, I walked for the first time, desperate to please my parents. I had so much performance anxiety that when I reached my father I puked all over him. He was wearing this fabulous velour polo shirt. It was never seen again.

Chaotic is how I’d describe my childhood. My parents shuffled between the US and Korea. I had a tapeworm at one point. My American doctor, who had never seen one, asked to keep it. I wonder where it is – and if my name is on it.

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