PM’s replies to Keir Starmer on the UK’s low rate of rape prosecutions and convictions were crass at best

“They jabber, we jab. They dither, we deliver. They vacillate, we vaccinate.” It’s asking a lot of an overindulged narcissist, but a man with even a patina of emotional intelligence might have realised that to accuse Labour of jabbering when Keir Starmer had used his six questions at prime minister’s questions to challenge the government’s record on the appallingly low rate of rape prosecutions and convictions was at best crass and at worst offensive.

But then Boris just can’t help himself. When the pressure’s on, the mask slips. The third-rate gag – don’t forget it was Johnson who once described investigations into non-recent child sex offences as money spaffed up a wall – is his modus operandi. It’s how he has traditionally tried to rescue himself from difficult circumstances. Do anything to raise a laugh from somewhere and hope to defuse the situation. Only when the subject matter is rape, it’s just not funny.

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