For one weird year, I was the human who stepped in to make sure a property chatbot didn’t blow its cover – I was a person pretending to be a computer pretending to be a person
The recruiter was a chipper woman with a master’s degree in English. Previously she had worked as an independent bookseller. “Your experience as an English grad student is ideal for this role,” she told me. The position was at a company that made artificial intelligence for real estate. They had developed a product called Brenda, a conversational AI that could answer questions about apartment listings. Brenda had been acquired by a larger company that made software for property managers, and now thousands of properties across the country had put her to work.
Brenda, the recruiter told me, was a sophisticated conversationalist, so fluent that most people who encountered her took her to be human.
> Hi! This is Brenda with Parc Mosaic. What unit are you interested in?
> We have 1BR starting at $1,484. Do you want to come in for an appointment at 1PM on Tuesday, Jun 11?
> I’m sorry to hear that! Will you be able to visit the property ahead of your move? If not, I will check with our agents to see if they can accommodate video tours.
> We have 1BR and 2BR starting at $1,484.
> Hi! This is Brenda with Springwoods at Lake Ridge. Which unit were you interested in?
> I’m interested in the one-bed with the turret
> My name is Candy
> Is that OK for you?
> Heavens no. My fiance has a murder charge and I’ve been evicted once … Sorry!
> Well I am a police officer yet I do have a misdemeanour on my record for something stupid yet I still am a police officer is that OK?
> Is that OK for you?
> Yes, but I want to disclose that I’m involved in a case against another apartment complex in the area. There is a bogus $5,000 judgment that I’m seeking to have nullified on the basis of filthy, uninhabitable living conditions. I have close to 100 pictures to submit as evidence. I’d be happy to show them to you tomorrow. That’s the only thing you will find for a negative rental history. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not the complaining type; very passive. I just don’t like to be lied to, tricked, and bullied.
> PS My car was also lit on fire.
> How old are the appliances?
> Why don’t you visit the property to see if it meets your needs?
> Is this unit on the ground floor? I’m disabled and can’t use stairs.
> Why don’t you visit the property to see if it meets your needs?
> Hi, My Name is Charmaine Banks. . . I’m Not Looking For An Apartment, I’m Actually Looking For My Biological Father Named Ernest Lockhart Shaw & I Think He May Be Living In One Of Your Residences Possibly Apartment #1421 ?? I Was Wondering Maybe You Could Help ?
> My name is Brenda, I’m a leasing agent at Springs at Kenosha. I’m responding to a call you made to this number. What unit were you interested in?
> are you available to meet
> we can meet at my beach house
> I’m interested in you Brenda I’m married so we have to be discreet
