No matter what the prime minister does, no matter the consequences, his devotees line up to heatedly excuse it

Last night’s Downing Street coronavirus briefing was given by Matt Hancock, now identifiable only by his dental records. According to Dominic Cummings, Hancock was a serial liar at a deadly level who should have been sacked 15 or 20 times. According to himself, Matt Hancock “threw a ring around care homes”. It would have been a lot better if he’d thrown the ring into Mount Doom instead.

Elsewhere, it has emerged that a government that came to power promising to control our borders has allowed 1.59 million – ONE POINT FIVE NINE MILLION – travellers to fly into the UK in the four lockdown months from January to April alone, two-thirds of whom were not UK nationals. If we don’t open up fully in three weeks, make sure to thank the Conservatives by popping a couple more points on their poll ratings.

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