Undeniable movie star charisma can’t save this torturous misfire about a couple who plan a heist during the London quarantine
For the handful of films and shows that were bravely, or often stupidly, marched into production during last year’s shutdown (one that continues to severely damage the industry), two key questions needed to be answered. First, can it be done safely with all precautions taken to protect the health of cast and crew? And second, is this project really worth it, worth all of the myriad difficulties attached, both financial and logistical? For talky heist romcom Locked Down, it appears as if safety was ensured and maintained (unlike many other shoots, no word emerged of on-set infections) but vitally, the small matter of “but should we?” appears to have been crucially, and tragically, overlooked. For not only would the film have been an insufferable bore without a global pandemic raging on but given the added stresses and strains and possible danger involved in making it now, its existence feels like even more of an offence, a head-smashingly redundant waste of time, talent, energy and resources, a shockingly early yet entirely convincing contender for worst film of the year.
Related: The White Tiger review – Balzac-worthy satire of submission and power
