After trauma the rational part of the brain cannot talk to the emotional side. Therapy can help with this
The question I can’t be bothered to exist any more. I have a solid job, although it’s taken me a long time and a huge amount of effort to prove my worth. I also have an amazing wife, a wonderful child and another one on the way. But I am just existing. The only instance of spontaneity this year has been the whole family contracting Covid. Yes, I realise life is hard, suck it up, buttercup.
I’ve felt like this ever since I was a child. I experienced something you must have heard hundreds of times: dad gone; stepdad abuses whole family; mum becomes zombie; my sister and I feel isolated. I obsess about either disappearing completely (barren landscape, cold, I chop wood, no phone) or something terribly violent (being hit by a car, etc). Another fantasy I’ve had since childhood is suicide, but with financial dependants it’s taken a backseat.
