From electricity-deficient mob dramas to ‘Gardeners’ World on acid’, here are the shows dreamt up during our excess of spare time
Ponying up for charity
We’ve had The Jump. We’ve heard the agonising slap of flab on drink in Splash! Celebs have proven time and again that they are willing to risk everything – injury, reputation, the privilege of being able to say: “I have never soiled myself on television” – if their agent suggests it would be beneficial to them not being dropped. So why not take this to its logical extreme: a gruelling, John O’Groats-to-Land’s End race … on Shetland ponies. The loser (almost certainly a weeping Timmy Mallett) then has to donate 50 grand of their own dwindling reserves to the other slebs’ charities. Drama, stakes, life-affirming derring-do, tiny adorwable wittle clompy-clomps: yes, that’s right, this show does have it all. Luke Holland
