YOU will never achieve success if you don’t know how to handle rejection. That is a strong statement. But it is perfectly true. So what is this rejection I’m talking about?
Rejection? Of course, we all know it. A boy toasts a girl. The girl looks him up and down and says, “Me, to befriend you? God forbid!” The boy thinks it is the usual shakara (playing hard-to-get) that girls make and persists in pursuing her. But this girl is quite serious. When the boy finally realizes it, he is devastated.
Rejection? The housewife who, just a year ago, was full of joy because almost everyone in her neighbourhood witnessed her husband feed her with cake at her wedding reception, finds that the man she believes is hers to cherish and to love, now comes home infrequently and spends more of his time with another woman.
Rejection? Here is an entrepreneur who has just finished a business plan and he is so sure that if he lays his hands on the seed money to get the project off the ground, the business will take off like a rocket. And it will be a question of time before he starts riding that BMW car he has always dreamt about.
Then he shows up with his feasibility study at the bank and, without as much as taking more than a cursory look at the contents, the bank manager says, “I’m sorry, we can’t fund you.”
Rejection? You are selling a product that you are convinced has many benefits that should make it a hot demand product. You’re so sure about this that you confidently load your van with the product and off you go to the marketplace. But by the time people start to pack their wares ready to go back home, you realize that no one has priced, not to talk of bought, one of your goods.
Yet you have spent the whole day trying to convince potential customers that your product is better than the competitor’s which has been selling like hot cakes.
Rejection? You have just submitted your 25th application for a job which your big uncle, who told you to write it, had put your mind at rest that there will be no problem in your getting it. The company’s owner, he assures you, is his golfing friend and he has told him about you after a game of golf last weekend.
You say to yourself:
“This is it. I’ll soon have a job of my own!” Then you appear for the interview on the appointed day, dressed smartly. And then the rudest shock of your life: the interview panel chairman shakes his head sadly and tells you: “Sorry, we can’t hire you!”
Rejection? You are launching a magazine. And you have made all the preparations. You have from six reputable men to choose as launch chairman. You set your mind on one of them. When you go and inform him, he says, “No. I don’t like being chairman at launchings. Don’t be offended. Please look for somebody else.”
So you say to yourself,
“At least there are five others.”
And you go to the next person on your list and he says, “You are informing me too late. I’m booked for that day.” And the next one says the same thing:
“I will be at so and so place at that time. If it were a place I could excuse myself from, I would. But I can’t.”
Panic begins to set in. The event, which you have planned painstakingly, is just a couple of days away. Yet you have been unable to confirm who will chair the occasion!
That last example actually happened to me. When SuccessDigest was to be presented to the public in September 1995, I was so confident anyone of our Advisory Board members would be available to do it for us. But by the time I heard three “noes”, I was in a blind panic. I thought the whole thing might flop. Each one of our Advisory Board members that I approached had one genuine reason or the other for declining the invitation.
By the time I approached Alhaji Adejumo, my nerves were on edge. Alhaji Adejumo was my obvious first choice to chair the event. But then he wouldn’t have arrived from Harare, Zimbabwe-where he led the Nigerian Olympic Committee delegation to the All Africa Games-for more than 48 hours before the launch was due. When you realize that Alhaji Adejumo was 74 going to 75 at that time, you will understand my reluctance not to put the burden on him.
Thank God, Alhaji Adejumo said yes, put off a scheduled meeting for that day and arrived at the launch venue, Nigerian Institute of International Affairs, at about 10.30a.m., a good 30 minutes before the take off and ahead of any of the invited guests!
I couldn’t have asked for more honour!
But look back at what I suffered before Alhaji Adejumo said “yes.” My wife and I were already getting confused. Everything had gone on fine up until the time came for us to go public with the announcement of our launch date. Even the Guest Speaker, who is an anointed man of God and a Covenant brother, Reverend Sam Adeyemi, didn’t give us any hassles before accepting to deliver what turned out to be the most powerful speech I have heard anybody give at such an occasion.
But rejection is definitely not fatal. The way to handle it is to keep knocking on the next door. For sure, one of the doors you knock on is bound to be opened for you.
Let me tell you this if it will lift up your spirits: I’m yet to encounter one individual who does not get crushed when he hears that most negative of all words: “No.”
But winners realize that “No” is never final or fatal. Just because one person or one thousand persons say(s) “No” to what you are asking from him does not mean you will never find someone that will say “Yes.”
Remember: Just one “yes” is enough to dry up a flood of “noes.” The delightful thing is that the one “yes” is so sweet it removes all the bitter taste of “noes ” you have received.
Quote:
“But rejection is definitely not fatal. The way to handle it is to keep knocking on the next door. For sure, one of the doors you knock on is bound to be opened for you….
“Just one “yes” is enough to dry up a flood of “noes.” The delightful thing is that the one “yes” is so sweet it removes all the bitter taste of the “noes ” you have received”
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