The Home Office does not believe I am who I say I am. Meanwhile, my pregnant wife and I have £80 a week to live on
- This article is part of the heat or eat diaries: a series from the frontline of Britain’s cost of living emergency
Our asylum case was refused. My solicitor rang to tell us. My wife was standing beside me, I was trying to keep calm for her but, in my mind, I was totally shocked. The solicitor was telling me that he was sorry, and not to worry. He said, “don’t take it personally”, and explained that he hoped we would appeal and that we had a very good chance of winning. In my mind, though, I was feeling fear and panic rising inside me. My wife was about to cry. I remembered everything that happened in our home country, the death threats, the danger and getting out – and suddenly it felt so close again. I thought, “We’re going to suffer. We’re going to be killed.”
The Home Office refusal was many pages long. It believed my age and my nationality, but it decided that everything else I said in the asylum interview was a lie. That interview, which took place more than a year ago, was exhausting and long. When the officer asked me questions, he would say, “Please try to answer briefly.” I tried to answer briefly but now they have decided that I didn’t supply enough detail. They said that the documents I supplied were false and could have been prepared here. I felt as if I was being called a liar and a cheat. In my country, I was one of the good guys, I was trying to help people – and now I have to live with this false image of myself. I can’t believe it.
As told to Anna Moore. Paul is in his 30s and is an asylum seeker living in the north of England. Names have been changed
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