Head of civil service proves to be the man who knew nothing about anything when grilled by MPs

Spare a thought for Simon Case. He’s diligently worked his way up the ladder to become the youngest head of the civil service and cabinet secretary only to be landed with Boris Johnson as prime minister. Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world. The Convict who thinks nothing of trashing the reputations of anyone and anything with which he comes in contact. People get chewed up and spat out in an unthinking heartbeat. Case is no exception. His is a precarious existence. Every day he must curse his luck that he didn’t get the top job five years later.

Case was giving evidence to the public administration and constitutional affairs committee for the first time since Partygate and Christopher Geidt’s resignation and he looked wary from the off. He fiddled with his pen and tapped his feet nervously on the floor. The committee chair, William Wragg – aka the Baby-Faced Assassin, got things under way. What percentage of his time did the cabinet secretary spend on propriety and ethics? Case thought for a while before deciding on up to 30%.

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