Be curious for your own sake about friendship, says Philippa Perry. You may have mild autism or something in your childhood may have made you defensive

The question I am a 32-year-old mum of a happy baby. I love him and I’m enjoying being on maternity leave. My husband is a lovely man who adores being a dad.

We have nice friends, but they are friends my husband has made. I go to the baby groups and I chat to people, but how do you actually make friends with someone? I was hoping our antenatal group would be a good place to make new friends, but it is a bit cliquey – it felt like being back in school. It felt competitive and we don’t have much money for all the baby accessories, activities and classes. We went to a barbecue at one mum’s house and it was a mansion and I’m embarrassed that our house is rented and small.

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