How to get the rightwing press and far-right Tories back on side? Bash refugees and the BBC of course
Big Dog was having a temper tantrum. He had been hiding out in Downing Street since Wednesday and all anyone was still talking about was the number of parties he had held and how long he could get away with lying about them. It’s just not fair, he had shouted at a member of staff. Why did everyone blame him for everyone in No 10 being pissed more often than not during lockdown when he was merely the person who had been in charge and let it all happen? It wasn’t his fault he was unable to see the difference between working and having a social event. Surely the person who warned him about the party on 20 May should have made a greater effort to get his message across?
“We need to move on,” he had said eventually. What was required was a secret plan. Or two secret plans. Operation Save Big Dog and Operation Red Meat. Secret plans that were so secret he was going to make sure everyone knew what they were. First off, he was going to sack however many members of staff were necessary for him to keep his job. Because that was the kind of threat that would be guaranteed to buy the loyalty of everyone in No 10.
